Who are you going to call first
You’ll see
Shhh quiet it’s ringing
Good evening House of Hum
Yeah I’ll take combo number five for delivery to (beep) Marvin Street
Mr. Sheeves is going to be pissed

Home alone after school
Ideal time to be a fool
Yellow pages in our hands
To hatch a devilish plan

While looking out for our mom
We’d ring up the House of Hum
Taxi cabs and pizza shops
We just couldn’t stop

We peaked out the window
While waiting for the show
Then the cars started to appear
From calls we engineered

Watching safely from inside
Laughing so hard that we cried
At the take outs from all around
And the bottle exchange downtown

The neighbours opened the door
Saw three or four cabs maybe more
This was the price they’d pay
Before call display

The drivers talked to one other
The prank they would soon discover
We, the culprits were unknown
Long before the iPhone

Woodside Pizza
Yeah I’d like an extra large pepperoni
Delivery

We would continue to spy
From the corner of our eye
And while we were binging on pringles
Cabbies chatted and they mingled

A cabbie reached into his pocket
Bought a pizza from the street market
Turned lemons to lemonade
They rose above the fray

Hey look, Mr. Sheeves is answering the door

The neighbours opened the door
(I didn’t order a pizza)
Saw three or four cabs maybe more
This was the price they’d pay
Before call display

The drivers talked to each other
The prank they would discover
We, the culprits were unknown
Long before the iPhone

But Mom came home early after work
From her job as a tax clerk
Asked us about the kerfuffle
And why the curtains were ruffled

Then she says
I don’t have any proof
But you boys are acting aloof
Go over and apologize
Or get grounded as your prize

Is Mr. Sheeves still staring over here
Yeah
Oh boy

The neighbours opened the door
Saw three or four cabs maybe more
This was the price they’d pay
Before call display

The drivers talked to one another
The prank they would soon discover
We, the culprits were unknown
Long before the iPhone

Before the iPhone
Before the iPhone
We, the culprits were unknown
Long before the iPhone
This was the price they’d pay
Before call display
Before call display
Before call display
This was the price they’d pay
Before call display
Before call display
Before call display

Oh yeah we pranked before Frank
(Oh yeah)
Before Frank Rizzo
(That’s right)
We pranked before Frank
(Uh-huh)
Before Frank Rizzo
(Yeah)